Holiday Basket
Posted on Tuesday, February 1st, 2011 at 6:24 pmhow did you cope with your first holiday after a loved one passed away?
This is my first holiday after my mom passed away March 5th. I feel so alone today. My kids are all excited about the baskets and candy, but I just want to lay in bed and cry. If you have any ways of coping I would appreciate it.
First of all, remember that losing someone you love, especially a parent is always a difficult thing to go thru. Second, remember that it is okay to cry, it's okay to feel depressed, sad, lonely, or even alone. Third, and this is probably one of the most important things, is think about how that person would want you to feel on that particular holiday. I used this one a lot when my grandmother passed away, who I missed tremendously for first, I did not even want to do anything, celebrate anything, or even be caught enjoying life when she was gone. But then, I stopped to think about how would my grandmother want me to feel on that particular holiday, and I started trying to feel that way. It's important to remember that the person is always with you, even when they are gone. If you need to put their photo in a frame and keep it close on the holiday, or wear their photo in a locket around your neck, do it, do whatever makes you feel better.
Enjoy the time that you have on this earth with your family, you never know when it will all be taken away from you. Try to focus in on your loved ones joy, and not think about the pain that you are feeling inside. Find someone that you can talk to, be it a complete stranger on the Internet that you need to "vent to", a grievance counselor, a friend, or a family member, find someone who you can say what you are thinking and how you are feeling to, so that you will be able to "share the burden" instead of trying to carry it yourself. It might help to continue a tradition that your mother started with your own kids each year, sort of an "in memory of" tradition that will make everyone feel better.
For me, the hardest holiday was Christmas, but Easter was also tough for the first couple of years. If it was not for my faith in God and my friends, I do not think I would have survived. If you ever need anyone to talk to, please feel free to e-mail me, and I would be happy to be a caring ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, or anything else that you are in need of without judging you. Lean on God, give Him your troubles, and know that your mother is with Him now, in total happiness celebrating this wonderful holiday. While you miss her, she is now better off than she ever was before.
Also, I love this poem that I have seen many times, it may be helpful to you as well, I hope it has as much meaning to you as it does to me:
Easter In Heaven
I see the countless Easter eggs around the world below,
With little chics and bunny rabbits that I can watch grow.
The sight is so wonderful please wipe away that tear,
For I am spending Easter with Jesus Christ this year.
I hear the many church services that people hold so dear,
But the sound of music can't compare with the angel choir up here.
There are no words to express the joy their voices bring,
For it is beyond description to hear the angels sing.
I know how much you miss me, I see the pain inside your heart,
For I am spending Easter with Jesus Christ this year.
I can't tell you of the splendor or the peace here in this place,
Can you just imagine Easter with our Savior face to face.
I'll ask him to lift your spirit as I tell him of your love,
So then pray for one another as you lift your eyes above.
Please let your heart be joyful and let your spirit sing,
For I am spending Easter in Heaven and I'm walking with the King.
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 1996 Longaberger Christmas Holiday Cheer Basket Combo $44.99 Time Remaining: 1d 41m Buy It Now for only: $54.99 |
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